My separation from my grand mother Marie Jeanne

At seven years old my father decided to take me to live with him in the Capital.Full of regrets, I left my grandmother with my mother out in the country. And I moved to my father's house in Port-au Prince.

 Arriving to his house in the capital, we had a nice life together. As a man he took care of me very well. He fed me, showered me, took me to school every morning and every afternoon when he was home. If he was not home somebody else would do it. Generally he used to do everything for me. What I liked the most was when he took me every afternoon after I finished my homework at six pm out to buy some (fritay) what we call fast-food in the United States but we do it in a different way in Haiti.

At the end of the year my father moved to the United States in 1999. I stayed with my brothers and sisters. Since that time my life started to change.  I had to wash my own clothes, nobody took me in and out from school, everything had changed. The only thing I didn't  do was cook for myself, but at age 13 I started to cook for myself .I couldn't Even make a good grade in  school anymore. When he was in the house he used to help me with my studies ; once he left I didn't have anybody to help me. When I got home from school if I studied my lessons and did my homework I did it, but nobody  cared. Now, everything was totally changed and I asked, why did my Father take  me away from my Grandmother? If I was still living with her, I would not be in this situation.

 Two years later, for summer vacation I went back to see my grandmother. She was very excited to see me. We had fun and everybody was happy. What made me more Happy was  when she called all her grandchildren and grouped us together with our parents and we took a trip to a river half an hour from our house.

We had a lot of fun we ate a lot of grilled fish and we drank a lot of coconut water. I really enjoyed my whole month with them. Then I came back in the Capital to continue with my school. I couldn't leave them especially my grandmother but I had to leave because I couldn't stay  any longer.

In 2005, I was far away from my mother's family. The communications were not like it is now, at that time most of the people had no cell phone or a home phone in their house, so it was hard for us to communicate with each other. 
 
 One day I decided to visit my mother's cousin, she was the closest of my mother's family member in the capital. When I got to her house, she asked me: "did you hear from your mother?" No, why? I replied. She said to me: "your grandmother had passed away two weeks ago", that was on Thursday. I was so quiet and I couldn't say anything just the way she sounded to me made me cry and she was crying also. Right after, I made my way back to my house without saying anything. But in my mind I knew "it was impossible for my grandmother to die, and my mother would not say anything to me. No, No, No, it was impossible because she knew how close we were together."

 A month later  I realized that was really true and the funeral was already over. At that time there were no morgues in the city, and the body could not have stayed for more than two days in the house. I was worried, and asked; why did my mother do that to me? Because my grandmother was sick for a few months before she passed away, and my mother never told me about it.
I didn't know why - probably she thought I was too young; my presence would not mean a lot, or maybe she was afraid of my father? I don't know. Because when my father took me away from my grand mother and my mother he didn't want me to go back to see them.
  Three years after her death, I visited them my pain and my worries were getting worse; then I heard from my uncle that my grand mother last words within her last breath: were:"would you let me go without seeing my daughter Didine"? she said to my mother. She used to call me Didine.
  I finally realized everybody has a time to live is life and when it's time to go when God wants  you or call you nobody can't stop it. this is away to say I can forget her death but forget her last words that's will never happen.