my future life

I have so many things that can get me have a happier future . I know it all depend on me in what I'm doing now and what I’m going to do to make them happen. Among these plans that I have three of them are very important to me. a) my health b) my relationship and my school. With these things I can already see a new life for me without reborn again.

 Almost  everybody think a good life depend on how much money they have or how they will make money for their future. for me, nothing it's more important than having a good health. One thing I know my health it's not depend on me but, on God. As a Christian who believes in God, I know he will keep me healthy to have a better future. I know God help who helps themselves once God sees you have volunteer to do something good he was ready before you to open all the doors.  I have God in all my plans especially my health I know he will keep me away from some diseases that he knows it can affect my future as he saves me now. Because a lot of people that I know who paralyse or have a serious health problem in our conversation they always say to me; "if I wasn't sick I would do this or that" fortunately I'm not one of them and I could be, because I used to be sick before. Not anymore God cured me he keeps me healthy and I know he will keep saving me.

 I always hope to have a good relationship. I prefer to say a good husband, my dream's marry to someone who really  love me, care for me, always ready to be there, for me in whatever of the situation. Not to  be here in a the good time and  forget about me in  bad moment no.. I want my husband to be a real Christian believe in  God and likes to pray as I do. It always good to have  someone with some common points with you. I know it's not easy  but it's not impossible also.  all the time I ask God for a good husband I know he will do it if he can give me a good boyfriend  even we have a long distance relationship but we know each other for a longtime and I know my boyfriend's a good one. I believe that God 's not going to change him  into a bad one in my marriage.

I know a  good life it's not only in the level of your education but it always good to be educated especially  at this time. Where educations play a big role in the society. For me to have a good life I need a good job and to have a good job I should go to school have a master so I can make money to support my  future and my family. I will never forget my family in my plans especially my parents .Because my dream is to become something in my life not anything but something good that can make  my parents so proud of me  even my kids in the future. I know to have my kids look good in my eyes I need to prepare to look good in their eyes first whenever God gives them to me. I don't have any kids yet but I always ask God for two beautiful kids they can be two girls or two boys or one girl one boy however he gives them to me.


   You don't need much to have a good life or a happier life. All you need   it a little  of sacrifice. I want to have a good life I'm ready to sacrifice myself. what I know  the more I sacrifice  for good thing in my life the fastest  it come in into my life.

How things can change anytime

I was a teenager my favorite day of the week was Friday. I had school Monday to Friday, after a long five days of school I could never wait for Friday to come . I counted Friday after school  as my day off, it's like  when you have a job and you can't wait for your day off to come.

Usually on Friday after school, I  had nothing to worry about. Tomorrow had never depend on me. I just had to think about what kind of game I would have to play with my friends  or how long  I would have to stay in  bed from Friday night to a late Saturday morning, because I had no responsibility ....nothing. After my long sleep I only had to study, do my  homework and played different games around with my friends  like hopscotch, jump rope and cards.

Jump rope

 

 Hopscotch, jump rope and cards were my favorite games. I enjoyed my weekend watching all the TV shows and got ready for  the next week of school.

Now everything is completely different. Before I had no responsibility including no bills. I couldn't imagine  how much I used to cost my parents a year .Now  while I'm in the reality, I  realize how hard that was for my parents. I remember I used to be lazy to get up in the morning when I had to go to school. Sometime I lied to my parents and told them that I was sick, I felt fever, or had stomach ache. I everything I knew that could make them believe me to not sent me to school.

 Now things have changed; everything is different. My responsibilities are too much for me, my bills, my plans, my future. Now they all depend on me, not on somebody else. I used to depend on my parents, now it's the opposite. It's their time now for them to depend on me especially my mother. I'm  her only one child in America and the only one who has a job. I have seven brothers and sisters in Haiti plus my mother. They all depend on me. I have to work hard to support them and myself too.

 Like I said when I was a teenager I used to lie to my parents so I could stay in bed when I didn't want to go to school. Now Sometimes I'm sick and I really need to stay in bed, but I think of  my bills and  responsibilities and I can't; I have to leave bed and go to work. Before I just had to worry about  getting up in the morning and going to school, but now it's different. I have to worry about going to work. I wasn't sick and I wanted to be sick to stay at home, but now even if I'm sick I still have to get up early and go to work.

You never know what's going to be happen in your life. I used to have my time to enjoy, play around with my friends. Now sometime I don't even have time to take a rest when my body gets tired. Always remember that nothing is permanent, things can change at anytime.

Lived in the United States with my father

In 2010 I came to the United States  when I was 21 to live with my father , Ryste,

Ryste & Guerdie

who is a real Christian from the Catholic Church. I remember the same day I came to the United States he took me to church to meet the Priest and his friends at church because it was on Easter weekend. That  weekend, he thanked God in his prayer for that blessed Easter we passed together. We  had never had a chance to be together in a big moment for the past 11 years.
 

 We would have more time in the house to focus on each other's behavior to see what was good and  what needed to change on each other, because my father and I  didn't know each other very well. He used to come to see me when I was a baby, took care of me, spent  money for me but he wasn't  in the house. And I didn't grow up with him. At seven years old he decided to take me to live with him, unfortunately it was only for one year. I was a little girl and  there was no time for us to get to know each other .
 

One of his character traits I observed  when I became an  adult was that he  talked too much; I realized that  before I moved to live with him in the United States because we used to talk on  the phone and I could see his reactions. But he had some good character traits too.
  What I love about my father is  that he is very responsible, caring, and loves  his children. He has five children, two boys and three girls and I'm the youngest. For this reason  I get more attention, more love, more care, even more control. 

At age 24, I decided it was time to have my independence  and I moved to my own apartment. It was so hard for him. He even got sick and depressed.  It wasn't his intention to see me leave the house before I get married. Even though I'm not in his house he still supports me. He always has his car available when I need it, he pays for my car repair, when he came in to my house he checks the refrigerator to see what I'm missing  and  brings some shopping in the house. He knows I like banana,  cereal, and green vegetables because he knows  I'm sick with anemia.
 Sometimes I feel like he does too much for me. But he always says to me: "I know you're not a healthy person you need to take care of yourself; When you were next to me I  wasn't afraid of anything, I knew how you used to eat, sleep, and wake up in the morning " he said to me.

  I love my father very much and I really appreciate his support, his love, and the way he takes care of me. He knows his  responsibilities as a father. I remember when I first came to  the United States, my father taught me how this country  changes people's life and all the opportunities I would have to make something in my life if I  had  gumption. He always wanted me to be a nurse. "If your brothers and your sisters came in the United States in their twenties almost thirties, and they became an engineer, nurse, social worker and business; you came younger and you are even smarter than them ..you can do it. I want to see you do something for yourself before I die. Once I see you  become something God can take me if he wants" he always say to me.

  I'm so proud to have my father in my life and no regrets for the time we had spent together. Now, we are living separately in different houses. One thing I know  is God will keep my father  and I  in life to have my dream come true.  My dream is to have my father living with me in my house when he gets older so I can take of him as he used to take care of me

ME&MY LOVELY  DAD

 

My separation from my grand mother Marie Jeanne

At seven years old my father decided to take me to live with him in the Capital.Full of regrets, I left my grandmother with my mother out in the country. And I moved to my father's house in Port-au Prince.

 Arriving to his house in the capital, we had a nice life together. As a man he took care of me very well. He fed me, showered me, took me to school every morning and every afternoon when he was home. If he was not home somebody else would do it. Generally he used to do everything for me. What I liked the most was when he took me every afternoon after I finished my homework at six pm out to buy some (fritay) what we call fast-food in the United States but we do it in a different way in Haiti.

At the end of the year my father moved to the United States in 1999. I stayed with my brothers and sisters. Since that time my life started to change.  I had to wash my own clothes, nobody took me in and out from school, everything had changed. The only thing I didn't  do was cook for myself, but at age 13 I started to cook for myself .I couldn't Even make a good grade in  school anymore. When he was in the house he used to help me with my studies ; once he left I didn't have anybody to help me. When I got home from school if I studied my lessons and did my homework I did it, but nobody  cared. Now, everything was totally changed and I asked, why did my Father take  me away from my Grandmother? If I was still living with her, I would not be in this situation.

 Two years later, for summer vacation I went back to see my grandmother. She was very excited to see me. We had fun and everybody was happy. What made me more Happy was  when she called all her grandchildren and grouped us together with our parents and we took a trip to a river half an hour from our house.

We had a lot of fun we ate a lot of grilled fish and we drank a lot of coconut water. I really enjoyed my whole month with them. Then I came back in the Capital to continue with my school. I couldn't leave them especially my grandmother but I had to leave because I couldn't stay  any longer.

In 2005, I was far away from my mother's family. The communications were not like it is now, at that time most of the people had no cell phone or a home phone in their house, so it was hard for us to communicate with each other. 
 
 One day I decided to visit my mother's cousin, she was the closest of my mother's family member in the capital. When I got to her house, she asked me: "did you hear from your mother?" No, why? I replied. She said to me: "your grandmother had passed away two weeks ago", that was on Thursday. I was so quiet and I couldn't say anything just the way she sounded to me made me cry and she was crying also. Right after, I made my way back to my house without saying anything. But in my mind I knew "it was impossible for my grandmother to die, and my mother would not say anything to me. No, No, No, it was impossible because she knew how close we were together."

 A month later  I realized that was really true and the funeral was already over. At that time there were no morgues in the city, and the body could not have stayed for more than two days in the house. I was worried, and asked; why did my mother do that to me? Because my grandmother was sick for a few months before she passed away, and my mother never told me about it.
I didn't know why - probably she thought I was too young; my presence would not mean a lot, or maybe she was afraid of my father? I don't know. Because when my father took me away from my grand mother and my mother he didn't want me to go back to see them.
  Three years after her death, I visited them my pain and my worries were getting worse; then I heard from my uncle that my grand mother last words within her last breath: were:"would you let me go without seeing my daughter Didine"? she said to my mother. She used to call me Didine.
  I finally realized everybody has a time to live is life and when it's time to go when God wants  you or call you nobody can't stop it. this is away to say I can forget her death but forget her last words that's will never happen. 

My grandmother was more than a grandmother to me. She loved me so much and we were very close to each other. Everybody thought I was her daughter

 

 

Marie-Jeanne Aceus

I was everywhere with my grandmother. Even if she went out for a few days or weeks I was always beside her. We used to live in the country, when you live in the country everything is different to the capital.

We had no electricity in the house. I didn’t have some luxuries in life, like the other kids who lived in the capital because there was no light, no stove, no refrigerator and no TV. Without those things, I had a good life with her life. I couldn't watch TV, but every day before bedtime she told me different stories about when she was young, or any joke she knew that could make me laugh.

Without   a refrigerator she kept me healthy by using wood stove every morning to make me a cup of salt-tea. I didn't like it, but I had to drink it, because she didn’t allow me to have any sugar in the morning." Too much sugar not good for your health especially in the morning. Without having anything salted yet" she said; I was able to have something sweet only at night after dinner.

 She used to make some pudding different flavor like banana, yucca, and chocolate. The banana putting was my favorite one. My grandmother was enjoyed to cook. And she use to cook every day because we didn't have a refrigerator to save any leftover food.. That way I learned from her how to cook because she was a good cook. That was her passion when she was young and continue into when she got old she used to prepare food for people who had to celebrate a big occasion. Sometimes she got pay for it, sometimes she did it free for her family.

 

 

My grandmother was famous in her fried pork and pikliz.  I enjoyed when she made them. and I always ask her to taste when I tasted for her she made sure I told her what's missing or not, but they always good to me even if she saw something was missing like a little salt or spicy, I didn't good enough to discover  what was missing. Sometimes she yield at me I want to be good in cooking so you can have your own restaurant be independently you don't have to work with nobody. And she kissed me I loved her very much

  Most of the time I told my friends and I keep telling them how I loved my grandmother more than my mother they cannot believe it. When they asked me why, I never told them the truth, especially people who know my mother.

 

I was four years old,

 

I don't remember exactly what was happening be , tween my mother and my grandmother; they had a discussion and my mother pushed my grandmother She almost fell and I started to cry. My

grandmother went to her room. She picked up her clothes and was about to leave the house. I was so sad but I couldn't say anything to my mother. The only thing I did just I kept follow my grandmother until she finished packed up her stuffs, and walked out to the courtyard. We both sat down there with her clothes next to her. I was panicked to see her with sadness in her face. Then, she told me she felt sorry she had to leave me, because she was going to one of my aunt's house in a different city. I was more panicked when I heard that.

 

 

 I explained to her how I’m going to miss her, how hard it would be for me to sleep without her. I've used to sleep with her in one bed. since I was a baby I never sleep next to my mother, I always next to Grandma because My mother use to remind me those things. I keep telling her how I enjoyed her stories at night, she was the only one who could make me sleep when I couldn't sleep especially when I have a cold. Finally she realized that remember of everything she got done for me. She changed her mind, and didn't go anymore.

   When my mother saw my reactions and heard about my conversation with my grandmother she realized how I loved my grandmother, if she left the house because of that situation; I would be unhappy in the house; She went to my grandmother apologized she felt guilty with tear in her eyes I was watching them, they gave peace to each other. Once they did that our great life continue as it was before.