At seven years old
my father decided to take me to live with him in the Capital of Haiti. Full of
regrets, I left my grandmother with my mother out from the Capital in Cornillon
a place in province. And I moved to my father's house in Port-au Prince Capital
of Haiti. Arriving to his house in the capital, we had a nice life together. As
a man he took care of me very well. He fed me, showered me, took me to school
every morning and every afternoon when he was home If he would not home for a
day he make sure somebody else would do it. He thought I was too little to do
these things by myself because in Haiti it is not like in America you have
school bus available for you, in Haiti student don’t have this opportunity
unless your parents hire someone privately for you or you go by public
transportations. Generally he used to do everything for me. What I liked the
most was when he took me out every evening
around 6 to 8 pm after I finished my homework my study he took to buy some hot
tea and (fritay) what we call fast-food in the United States but we do it in a
different way in Haiti. In Haiti what
call fast food it like fried pork, fried hot dogs, fried potatoes, fried plantains
etc. what’s make it more funn it’s like the way they sell like they sit around
the street in a nice weather as you know
it always summer time in Haiti. Sitting outside around the street or in your
back yard with your family and friends with a nice plate of fritay it very fun it even more fun around the street at night once you stay nice
and quiet you make any drama you can have high music everybody enjoyed it police officers won’t get no phone calls from neighborhood
to complaint about your nosy nothing.
At the end of the
year in June 1999 my father moved to the United States to live with my step
mother. I stayed with my brothers and sisters. Since that time my life started
to change, I had to wash my own clothes, nobody took me in and out from school
no more, even a good grade I couldn't make in school no more, because I had
nobody to look over me nobody cares if I studied or did my homework nothing. The
only thing I didn’t do was cooking my own meals, but at age 13 I started to
cook for myself. Everything had changed. I started to think about When he was
in the house how he used to help me, with my studies; once he left I didn't
have anybody to help me. When I got home from school if I studied my lessons
and did my homework I did it, but nobody cared. Perhaps when he was there
everybody always make sure I did well, because of his presence they pretended
to be care. When I realize I was the one who was responsible for my own care
like that even I wasn’t able to, I started to asked, why did my Father take me away from
my Grandmother and my mother ? If I was still living with them, I would not be
in this situation…….to finish… Two years later, for summer vacation I went back
to see my grandmother. She was very excited to see me. We had fun and everybody
was happy. What made me more Happy was when she called all her grandchildren
and grouped us together with our parents and we took a trip to a river half an
hour from our house?
We had a lot of fun we ate a lot of grilled
fish and we drank a lot of coconut water. I really enjoyed my whole month with
them. Then I came back in the Capital to continue with my school. I couldn't leave
them especially my grandmother but I had to leave because I couldn't stay any
longer.
In 2005, I was far away from my
mother's family. The communications were not like it is now, at that time most
of the people had no cell phone or a home phone in their house, so it was hard
for us to communicate with each other.
One day I decided to visit my mother's cousin,
she was the closest of my mother's family member in the capital. When I got to
her house, she asked me: "did you hear from your mother?" No, why? I
replied. She said to me: "your grandmother had passed away two weeks
ago", that was on Thursday. I was so quiet and I couldn't say anything
just the way she sounded to me made me cry and she was crying also. Right
after, I made my way back to my house without saying anything. But in my mind I
knew "it was impossible for my grandmother to die, and my mother would not
say anything to me. No, No, No, it was impossible because she knew how close we
were together."
A month later I realized that was really true
and the funeral was already over. At that time there were no morgues in the
city, and the body could not have stayed for more than two days in the house. I
was worried, and asked; why did my mother do that to me? Because my grandmother
was sick for a few months before she passed away, and my mother never told me
about it.
I didn't know why - probably she
thought I was too young; my presence would not mean a lot, or maybe she was
afraid of my father? I don't know. Because when my father took me away from my grandmother
and my mother he didn't want me to go back to see them.
Three years after her death, I visited them my pain and my worries were
getting worse; then I heard from my uncle that my grandmother last words within
her last breath: were: “would you let me go without seeing my daughter
Didine"? She said to my mother. She used to call me Didine.
I finally realized everybody has a time to live is life and when it's
time to go when God wants you or call you nobody can't stop it. This is a way
to say I can forget her death but forget her last words that's will never
happen.
